How it happened
Okay, here's why this blog exists.
I had another blog, and I thought I was doing pretty well with it. I like to write, and I enjoy sharing my overflowingly bounteous opinion with anyone who will stand still. So, blogging seemed like it was for me.
Of course, I'm married, which complicates things. How, you ask? Well, my wife didn't like my blog. Now, I want to be very clear on this part: I never wrote anything that gave away my identity, or my location, or any of the real-time stuff that can get you into trouble. when I posted pictures, as I also liked to do, I posted only back-of-the-head shots a la Brian, one of my favorite bloggers. I also was careful only to write good things about my wife and kids, not just because I knew she would be reading what I wrote, but because I really love her, and the kids.
However, I guess I wasn't careful enough.
On one of the blogs I read (or used to read), the writer posted her picture -- a back of the head shot. Because she was under fluorescent lighting, her hair appeared to be of a peculiar color. Several readers inquired, was that deliberate? She replied with a new picture, in which her actual hair color was clearly visible.
I said: "It's red! I think redheads are hot! (but don't tell my wife I said that.)
That was all it took.
My wife was ready to divorce me from the instant she read that. I tried to reason with her; I said, honey, you KNOW I like redheads, and besides, that was clearly a joke! I mean, I didn't know this other girl, never knew her real name, never knew anything about her (other than the fact that she was a redhead, natch), and CERTAINLY would not begin an affair that way, or any other for that matter.
My wife wouldn't budge. I was a cheater, I had committed internet adultery (her actual words), and we were through. She didn't stop there, though; she wrote this other girl a very nasty email using my name, and then used my name to further post on all of the blogs that I loved to read, guaranteeing me "troll" status for the rest of my life, at least with those people.
But she didn't stop there.
After several days of her various little methods of revenge, I was standing in our kitchen doing some dishes. She came in, and dumped out the last of the coffee from the day before.
"You know," I said, (in a very I-could-care-less tone) "You just got some of that coffee on my clean dishes."
"Really?" she said, as if this was the most fascinating observation in the world, and then she smashed the coffee pot in my face. No, I'm not kidding; the coffee pot shattered when it hit my head (OF COURSE!) and cut my left eyebrow, eye socket, and eyelid. I missed losing my eye by less than a centimeter. A half inch shard of glass stuck in my forehead, and they had to pull it out when I got to the emergency room.
So, now some obvious questions are occuring to you. Let me answer them as best I can:
No, I didn't have her arrested.
No, I didn't leave the house right then, never to return.
Like I told you, I love her, and I love my kids. So, I decided not to press charges, and shortly thereafter we were able to make up -- sort of.
Of course, things are still weird. This was just over two weeks ago, and my eye hasn't even completely healed yet. (Yep, it's gonna leave some dandy scars.)
So now, we're kind of tiptoeing around the issue, and the last thing I want to do is stir already muddied waters. I want to stay married, and keep all of the things I've worked for. I want to keep my kids in my life, not just have to pay for them without ever getting to see them.
But I wanna blog, too. Like I said, I was so careful about it, and I enjoy it so much. I can't believe that it's wrong. Thus, my secret blog, where I can still write what I want, but (God willing!) she never has to know.
Do you think that's bad?
I had another blog, and I thought I was doing pretty well with it. I like to write, and I enjoy sharing my overflowingly bounteous opinion with anyone who will stand still. So, blogging seemed like it was for me.
Of course, I'm married, which complicates things. How, you ask? Well, my wife didn't like my blog. Now, I want to be very clear on this part: I never wrote anything that gave away my identity, or my location, or any of the real-time stuff that can get you into trouble. when I posted pictures, as I also liked to do, I posted only back-of-the-head shots a la Brian, one of my favorite bloggers. I also was careful only to write good things about my wife and kids, not just because I knew she would be reading what I wrote, but because I really love her, and the kids.
However, I guess I wasn't careful enough.
On one of the blogs I read (or used to read), the writer posted her picture -- a back of the head shot. Because she was under fluorescent lighting, her hair appeared to be of a peculiar color. Several readers inquired, was that deliberate? She replied with a new picture, in which her actual hair color was clearly visible.
I said: "It's red! I think redheads are hot! (but don't tell my wife I said that.)
That was all it took.
My wife was ready to divorce me from the instant she read that. I tried to reason with her; I said, honey, you KNOW I like redheads, and besides, that was clearly a joke! I mean, I didn't know this other girl, never knew her real name, never knew anything about her (other than the fact that she was a redhead, natch), and CERTAINLY would not begin an affair that way, or any other for that matter.
My wife wouldn't budge. I was a cheater, I had committed internet adultery (her actual words), and we were through. She didn't stop there, though; she wrote this other girl a very nasty email using my name, and then used my name to further post on all of the blogs that I loved to read, guaranteeing me "troll" status for the rest of my life, at least with those people.
But she didn't stop there.
After several days of her various little methods of revenge, I was standing in our kitchen doing some dishes. She came in, and dumped out the last of the coffee from the day before.
"You know," I said, (in a very I-could-care-less tone) "You just got some of that coffee on my clean dishes."
"Really?" she said, as if this was the most fascinating observation in the world, and then she smashed the coffee pot in my face. No, I'm not kidding; the coffee pot shattered when it hit my head (OF COURSE!) and cut my left eyebrow, eye socket, and eyelid. I missed losing my eye by less than a centimeter. A half inch shard of glass stuck in my forehead, and they had to pull it out when I got to the emergency room.
So, now some obvious questions are occuring to you. Let me answer them as best I can:
No, I didn't have her arrested.
No, I didn't leave the house right then, never to return.
Like I told you, I love her, and I love my kids. So, I decided not to press charges, and shortly thereafter we were able to make up -- sort of.
Of course, things are still weird. This was just over two weeks ago, and my eye hasn't even completely healed yet. (Yep, it's gonna leave some dandy scars.)
So now, we're kind of tiptoeing around the issue, and the last thing I want to do is stir already muddied waters. I want to stay married, and keep all of the things I've worked for. I want to keep my kids in my life, not just have to pay for them without ever getting to see them.
But I wanna blog, too. Like I said, I was so careful about it, and I enjoy it so much. I can't believe that it's wrong. Thus, my secret blog, where I can still write what I want, but (God willing!) she never has to know.
Do you think that's bad?
posted by County Boy at 3:35 PM
2 Comments:
That's too bad...but I relate. I'm getting snotty comments from friends and family regarding my blog. I'm taking a different approach. "Fuck em". Blogging is sort of therapy for me. I am doing my best to keep my posts "non-personal" regarding others, but its nothing I wouldn't say to their face. One of the reasons I'm sorta content with my singlehood....nobody attempting to censor my every word or thought. Good luck my friend!
NJ
Wow! That's just plain crazy. You made a comment on someone's hair on the internet, and she calls it cheating? Do you believe this to be anywhere in the neighborhood of normal? I assume not. Surely there must have been signs of this sort of behavior before? What did you think about it then? That is...well...like I said... just plain crazy! I think my reaction would have been to get out. I wish you the best of luck, and thanks for the comment on my blog.
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